1 star 🛑SPOILERS AND LOT'S OF PEDO JOKES INCOMING BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW HOW TO CONTROL MYSELF🛑 The plot was so all over the place, we got everything the heart could wish for: Forbidden predator biker falls for the illegal teenager with cancer whom he has shared bullets with when she was 7 before he went to jail and they became pen pals. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...........🙌✨Giana Darling✨🙌 The best thing is the cancer was there for no reason at all. She got sick at 7 then again at 16 and we had ZERO memorable mentions of it the entire book. Almost as if she doesn't have it until she suddenly passes out and we get the cancer drama that added nothing to the plot, brought no awareness, squeezed no emotions out of me, and used up precious reading time I could've wasted on something more useful. Anyways moving on.....I scrolled through some reviews and I am shocked that barely anyone talks about the very big and obvious pedophilic elephant in the room. let's just all imagine for a second what would happen if Lou was not interested in Zeus. He would turn from a guardian monster to a guardian molester so quick. The author really teetered on the edge of making this sh*t as taboo as possible without crossing any MAJOR lines huh😂 ➥ Hero and heroine met when she was 7 and he 26 (he saved her life)
➥ They wrote letters to each other until she was 16. All very innocent of course (I think)
➥ Hero has TWO KIDS and one of them is OLDER than her😭 this was the thing that made me extremely uncomfy
➥ Hero started lusting after her when she was 17 and he 36 (also when their sexual relationship started)
Okay so maybe some people would consider this "major lines" but we all already established I'm going to hell. Initially those tropes spoke to me on a cellular level.
There were times when Zeus would say things that are undoubtedly really creepy but a GUILTY pleasure all the same😭
Wonderin’ what she tasted like had been drivin’ me crazy for months. In my dirtiest fantasies, she tasted like cherry lollipops, the kind she’d liked as a kid.
What did it matter that Lou was her age in number if not in f*ckin’ maturity?
Yea. You know what other numbers don't matter Zeus?
Thing is I started reading this with positive vibes since I was more or less enjoying myself the first 50%. but it really went downhill for me once Zeus started waxing poetic musings about the heroine being the ONE and ONLY.
She was it.
My ex-wife had been a mistake, every other woman a blip and Louise Lafayette, the forbidden girl, the worst option, was the only one for me.
My question is why?
You have never known Lou as a grown adult, and I don't care how many times they kept repeating about her being a "woman". You are SEVENTEEN, don't fool yourself. Cancer doesn't make a woman out of you, it simply makes you a little girl with thicker skin.
Back to the point, he has never had a meaningful adult conversation with her in order to fall in love.
Imagine being a 36 year old man with a girlfriend who still has to ask permission for sleepovers and throws tantrums with words like "YoU cAn'T cOnTrol mE". She had an honest to god NANNY up until like 2 years ago. Might as well plan your romantic dates at daycare.
The only thing she has going for her is long blonde hair, big tit*, nice ass & a tiny waist which we got to hear about a whole lot. Since apparently looking like a sex doll makes it less predatory n all🤸♀️. Personality-wise though? She still needs a pacifier and Zeus an ankle monitor.
At that point all I started to feel was guilt without the pleasure because Zeus, that sneaky little sh*t, started to play with fire💀
This was happenin’. Me and Lou. If I was bein’ honest, it had been happenin’ since I saw that pretty girl with her velvet bows and Mary Janes running at me from across a parking lot rainin’ bullets like I was Jesus come to save ’er. I knew in some freakish place deep inside the gut a me that Lou was made for me.
“You a teenage girl or the woman who’s all woman I took to my bed last night twice and again this mornin’?”
Em no I'm pretty sure she was a teenage girl in both situations my guy😀
“Ten years waitin’ for you to grow up so I could do this.” Then I slammed my mouth to hers.
[...]
My co*ck was so hard it ached like a motherf*cker but I needed this, needed to see this girl I’d wanted since before it was legal beg for me
The author is f*cking doing this on purpose I swear to god🤣🤣🤣 miss are you trying your best to make me uncomfortable??? Are you trying to outdo the king of all child groomers bestie?? don't try<3
But if I'm being honest, the fact that Zeus was a closeted pedo wasn't even my problem.
Jail to me, jail to my whole family, jail to my offspring for saying what I said^. I KNOW.
I would've given this book 3 stars if Lou matured better and their relationship development didn't solely depend on the fact that he knew her since her early childhood. That was the only thing binding them together. They kept talking about their "matching scars" from when he saved her life like it meant something. Well guess what, it didn't mean sh*t because you two idiots have NOTHING in common apart from two bullet holes. Congratulations.
Because of that, this didn't feel romantic at all. Even the darkest of books should feel romantic because THIS IS A GODDAMN ROMANCE. It felt more like cheap erotica, an extended little-girl fantasy which honestly pissed me off to no end......and it wasn't even because of the subject of the fantasy but more so the execution.
The way the author kept making pedophilic innuendos and then reverted back to Zeus calling the teenage heroine a "woman". As if that will make it better. Was she trying to convey something like *oh Lou may be young and Zeus finds it hot enough to fetishize into fantasies but she is still a woman🤡*
Because like honey......no she isn't. Make up your mind, I don't like delusional groomers. Either make him a proud groomer or no groomer at all bby, it's that simple.
And now I just have two more completely random things that bothered the hell out of me:MY 13TH REASON part 1
The moment I saw the words
I may have been a classically trained ballerina but I was a virgin about to do a strip-tease for the Lord of the Damned
I could not describe the feeling of my heart sinking straight to my asshole. THE WHOLE SCENE FELT SO EMBARRASSING EVEN THOUGH IT WASN'T MEANT TO BE. Like she was fully feeling herself up there meanwhile I was just...
As she was pole dancing half-naked NOT JUST FOR THE HERO, but a room filled with bikers she has become FRIENDS WITH, she kept saying sh*t like:
It was my moment to make a very serious point.
I wasn’t a little girl anymore.
I was a woman, one with dark thoughts and deviant desires.
All I kept thinking was who let this fetus on stage💀
How Lou greeted adulthood with a stripper pole:
MY 13TH REASON part 2
Not only was the hero a lil pedo-boo😏 but he was an ugly one too (in my active imagination). I found every other man in this book more physically attractive than him.
➥ For one, I can't stand heroes with long hair. My brain instantly travels to dark places full of tangles, grease and dandruff. I can't control it.
➥ The way he talked paired with the MC slang they all used, which was very accentuated in the spelling, had me imagining his voice. I know this will sound really stupid and senseless but to my ears he spoke like a toothless 60 year old. I'M SO SORRY😭😭😭.
➥ I just overall had a very dirty picture of a biker in my head. That can be sexy at times but today....
Today all those things put together looked like this:
Anywho this is entirely my brain and not this book's fault. Just an FYI.
In other news🧐 here is Zeus trying to convince the readers, the judge & the holy spirit that he is innocent
